Category Archives: Discipline



Recovery is not for the faint of heart. It is however for the bold, the brave, the desperate, the addict, the weary and the broken. You simply have to be human to need recovery. The human condition is such that breeds hurt, dysfunction and pain. No one is immune because no one is perfect. There is a perception that recovery is for “those” people. Well I’m here to say it absolutely is for “those” people for your mom, dad, sister, brother, boss, pastor, best friend and for YOU. Celebrate Recovery is for definitely me. I have been in recovery now for 2 plus years and it is the best thing I ever have done for myself. If you look back at my blog there is some dark and desperate posts that characterized my battle with panic and anxiety. I was a person who didn’t think recovery was for me and I didn’t need help, I would figure it out on my own. I could not have been more wrong, I was in a constant state of chaos, reeling from hurt, ignoring God and saying yes to all the wrong people and situations. I was lost and I couldn’t even see it.

The first day I walked through the doors of Celebrate Recovery was probably one of the most transformative days of my life. That’s the day I started saying yes to God and no to my own way. Allowing God to transform me into the person He wants me to be and it has been one of the hardest battles I’ve faced. One of the hardest things in recovery is to face the truth. The truth that I and I alone was responsible for my pain, that I cant do it on my own and need help. Yes people hurt, took advantage and negatively affected my life, but I made the choices that created chances for people to hurt me. I didn’t protect the life and heart that God had given me from the sickness of the world. I had become casual about sin and had a someday attitude. Some day I will live for Christ, when I am through school, happily married, thin, more financially stable…the list goes on. Someday hit me squarely between the eyes and said NO TODAY IS THE DAY YOU CHANGE YOUR LIFE. My panic attacks were debilitating and getting worse everyday. I wasn’t functioning anymore and I tried to fool myself into believing that I could just muddle through it. But I was slowly dying it was a matter of time and I would have been dead. Maybe not physically but emotionally, spiritually dead. In reality I was there and it was no kind of life it was pure torture.

Miracles still happen God brought me, the dead, back to life.  I have now been 2 years without a panic attack, but the most miraculous thing that has happened since I have been in recovery is that I have a renewed faith and sense of hope. God has brought me out of denial and apathy onto a path of redemption, grace, forgiveness, truth and spiritual growth. He brought me to Himself and is allowing me to enjoy my progress and see my growth. He is showing me how to use my life in service to him and I love the work He is doing in me. For the first time in many years I can say that this year is going to end on a high note and I am looking forward to what God has for me next year!


cr welcome


No and other lessons…


Working in day care truly highlights your strengths and weaknesses in ways that always leave me laughing, pondering, or super frustrated. Yesterday was the latter I was working with 1 and 2 year olds all day and it turned out to be an interesting endeavor. One of my kids is as stubborn as a mule sometimes, he just turned 2 and has learned the appropriate use of no to maddening perfection. The little cute toot simply thinks its hilarious to yell no about any request I made. I was getting more and more frustrated. With six little cherubs in my care for one to not listen and rebel against my authority makes it difficult to manage the class, especially while doing tasks like changing diapers or trying to round them up to go inside from the play ground.  

Every time I he no’ed me I found myself saying “no you do not tell your teachers no” after the 10th time (yes my learning curve is on the slow side) I thought to myself…how is he supposed to learn to not say no when that is all he hears all day. No don’t climb on the table, no don’t hit your friends, no don’t rip that book…Aaahhh NOOOO. At my wit’s end with this simple revelation I was at a loss as to how to move forward. I want all the kids in my care to have a healthy respect for authority and to be respectful to the adults in their lives. I believe it is never too early to be teaching these lessons…I also believe that children understand far more than we give them credit for.

With that being said the rest of the day I wondered how to teach the lesson that needed to be learned and model the appropriate behavior myself. How can I creatively say NO without saying NO? Many times as a parent I have faced this kind of challenge as well. How do you curb undesirable behavior without negatively reinforcing it or other behaviors along the path through your methods. I am thinking an pondering on my methods and would love some input on the subject. 🙂