I lost my job I didn’t even make it a week. I was given a…we realized we don’t need you excuse and I am certain that there was more too it. I think despite the hurt and frustration I feel I can admit that I felt like the position was not right for me. As for my part in it I know that I didn’t do anything wrong and that I can firmly say that it was not about me. It doesn’t make it easier that I have to start looking again I saw laid out before a way to ease our financial burdens and maybe get a little but ahead. So I feel like I lost even though it wasn’t my fault. With the struggles I deal with like anxiety and self-confidence it really hits me hard when I take a blow to the ego. But this time around I didn’t even let myself cry. I have felt like I carried a dark cloud over my head today I was testy and irritated most of the day but I think that I can shake this off and move forward. I am going to start the job hunt again and figure out what works best for me and Peanut girl. I haven’t quite processed many of the things that have happened in the last 6 months so I think much more will come when I begin to figure it all out. I think I have some thoughts to process and issues to work through to get on top of my game for tonight those of you who pray please pray that I have confidence, follow through, and that I can continue to pursue health in all areas in my life. I may have lost but I am trying to see it as gain…I want to gain perspective, to find the right fit, and the place God wants me to be.